Episode 11 - Guilt-Free Boundary Setting: It's Not Mean, It's Necessary
In This Episode, You'll Discover:
Why guilt is information, not a command—and how to tell the difference
The three domains where guilt-based control shows up most (and specific scripts for each)
How to listen to your body's wisdom when setting boundaries
Nicole's personal boundary stories from PTO volunteering and workplace challenges
The difference between boundaries that serve you vs. boundaries that drain you
Practical strategies for handling family guilt trips and workplace manipulation
Why some people will push back against your boundaries (and why that's actually good news)
How to reframe boundaries as necessary for sustainable giving, not selfishness
Key Quotes:
"You're not broken. You're buried."
"Setting boundaries isn't mean. It's necessary. It's not selfish. It's self-preserving."
"The version they loved was the one who never said no."
"Your competence is not your cage."
"Every time you doubted yourself, you were right—they just convinced you otherwise."
Boundary Scripts Covered:
Workplace: How to address workload without seeming like you're not a team player
Family: Responses to "but we're family" guilt trips
Social: Declining invitations and requests without over-explaining
This Week's Challenge: Set one boundary in an area where you typically feel guilt. Notice the guilt without acting on it, and journal about the experience.
Resources Mentioned:
Previous episodes on "Hell No!" and energy vampires
Body wisdom practices for boundary setting
The difference between guilt and intuition
This episode is for educational purposes and is not a substitute for professional mental health treatment.
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DISCLAIMER: This podcast may cause sudden outbreaks of truth-telling, boundary-setting, and unapologetic self-expression. Side effects include losing people who preferred you silent.